Ken Sneed, MDiv, MA, LPC, LMFT

A recent comment by a friend about an e-mail he received revived an old, and nagging, question that has dogged me for years: Why did God do that to us? I know I’m not the first to wonder about this problem that we have.  You know, the differences between the way husbands and wives approach life. I also know that many will think this is a silly question to waste time wrestling with. But I still think it’s a good question. One aspect of it that grabs my interest is that many times the question is about differences in the ways men and women approach circumstances they face.  Frequently, the differences that were so attractive grow over time into big irritations after the “I do’s” are said. What’s up with that?

If you don’t think that there are gneral differences in the way men and women approach life read a book like, Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus.  It’s not a heavy study in psychology, but people usually find a lot of themselves and their partner described in those pages in general terms. Frequently, it gives some relief just to know that the differences that are experienced are not unusual. The commonality lends comfort, and still, those irritating differences continue. If you have ever seen the movie, or a stage production of, My Fair Lady, you might remember the sentiment vocalized by Professor Higgins in which he wondered why women can’t think like men. Without a doubt, women are wondering why men can’t process life like a woman, which would make much more sense . . . to them.

The e-mail I referenced at the beginning of this article has to do with a picture of a machine that represents a woman’s brain, with a multitude of knobs and dials and guages that are needed to engage a woman in an intimate relationship. The depiction of the man’s brain has one switch, labeled “on/off.” If it was really that simple, it might be easier to navigate the quagmire of male/female relationships. The problem is compounded, though, by the differences in personalities and the way in which each person was reared in their families during childhood.

Perhaps the question doesn’t need to be, “Why did God do that to us?” but rather, “What am I going to do to make this relationship as enjoyable as possible?” Whether God set us up this way as part of our inherited punishment for Adam and Eve’s original sin, or He made us this way to keep life from being boring, or for some other reason we don’t comprehend, that’s the way it is.  So what are we going to do with what we’ve got? I don’t believe that God is so vindictive that He’s done this to us for punishment. I do believe that for whatever the reason for the differences, it’s our choice as to how we deal with it. We can either be angry and stew in it, or we can choose to work on making the good aspects of our relationship better and celebrate happiness wherever it might appear.  The choice belongs to each of us.  Check out the Minirth/Meier book, Happiness Is a Choice, and see if you aren’t convinced that life is what you choose to make of it, as are the relationships to which we commit ourselves.

This question about our differences is at the top of my list to ask God about when I get to heaven.  I just know that I’ll be embarrassed by the wisdom and simplicity of His answer.  Right now, though, it’s really confusing!

While perusing my e-mail I chased down a link to one of the best lectures I’ve ever heard. In part it’s because of the the lecturer’s situation. You may have heard about Dr. Randy Pauch’s Last Lecture. I had heard that a university professor who was dying gave an interesting lecture, but I’d not heard the content of his speech. The link that follows will connect you to his lecture. This link takes you to the tape of his original lecture, delivered at Carnegie Mellon University where Dr. Pauch was a professor. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji5_MqicxSo&NR=1)

I’m impressed that this man has a grip on the important things of life. It would be interesting to know what his faith basis for life is, because his suggestions for living happily are an echo of what Jesus encouraged. It’s horribly disappointing that so many people don’t exhibit the attitude that he lives. Determining to be happy with what one has and appreciating those who contribute to life in a variety of ways is the best medicine for tough times and disappointing experiences. (Philippians 4:8)  I realize that there will be criticism because he talks about “karma” providing for those who live the right kind of life.  I don’t know if he’s using it as a general, philosophical term or in the strict sense as part of Hindu belief.  I just know that God does get us through the tough times when we give him our trust.  The reward is in faithfulness to God as we deal with the stuff of life, both “good” and “bad.”

Check out the video and see if it doesn’t challenge the way you look at life.

There is a new movie coming out under the title of, The Golden Compass. The trailers in the theaters look very interesting and exciting. A children’s movie that is a fantasy of Narnian quality. Actually, it appears to be a story in response to, The Chronicles of Narnia, by C.S. Lewis. Phillip Pullman, the author, is purported to be a self-proclaimed atheist who dislikes Lewis’ writings, so he penned a trilogy to promote his theology that there is no God. If you’re interested, you may want to read the report on Snopes.com, the website that confirs/disconfirms urban legends. Click on the following link to read their report: http://snopes.com/politics/religion/compass.asp.

Please understand, this blog is not condemning Pullman’s right to write such a novel, nor is it my goal to denigrate him as a person. I would defend his right to present his point of view just as I want the right to expound my viewpoint. I want to inform those who might take their children to view a childrens’ fantasy resulting in a line of thought that is not spiritually healthy. I am planning on viewing the movie so I can make an informed decision on my own and be able to address the issues presented in a, hopefully, intelligent manner. I wouldn’t take my children to see it if they were under 16 years old, and even then, we would have a long discussion about the direction it was going in an effort to throw light on a comparison with what we believe as Christians.

Do the research and determine for yourself if you believe your children should be exposed to a media presentation expressly intended to be oppositional to God. If you allow it, be ready yourself to examine the Scriptures and know what you believe so you can present an informed defense of what you believe. (1 Peter 3:15-16)

I recently received the following interesting, hilarious summary of the Bible. You may have seen this already, but a reread would still be fun. (I’d be more than happy to identify the original source, but no credit was given in the e-mail.)

Bible Story by 8 year Kids

In case you’re a little foggy on your biblical history, let our junior church students help you with this complete overview of the Bible, compiled from their essays. This is one clever rendition of the ‘Bible in a Nutshell’!

Enjoy!…. laughter is a gift from God!

In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God, darkness, and some gas.

The Bible says,’The Lord thy God is one,’ but I think He must be a lot older than that.

Anyway, God said, ‘Give me a light!’…and someone did. Then God made the world.

He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam and Eve were naked, but they weren’t embarrassed because mirrors hadn’t been in vented yet.

Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden. Not sure what they were driven in though, because they didn’t have cars.

Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel.

Pretty soon all of the early people died off, except for Methuselah, who lived to be like a million or something.

One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy, but one of his kids was kind of a Ham.

Noah built a large boat and put his family and some animals on it. He asked some other people to join him, but they said they would have to take a rain check.

After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jacob was more famous than his brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his birthmark in exchange for some pot roast.

Jacob had a son named Joseph who wore a really loud sports coat.

Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was Charlton Heston.

Moses led the Israel Lights out of Egypt and away from the evil Pharaoh after God sent ten plagues on Pharaoh’s people.

These plagues included frogs, mice, lice, bowels, and no cable.

God fed the Israel Lights every day with manicotti. Then He gave them His Top Ten Commandments. These include don’t lie, cheat, smoke, dance, or covet your neighbor’s stuff.

Oh, yeah, I just thought of one more: Humor thy father and thy mother.

One of Moses’ best helpers was Joshua who was the first Bible guy to use spies. Joshua fought the battle of Geritol and the fence fell over on the town.

After Joshua came David . He got to be king by killing a giant with a slingshot. He had a son named Solomon who had about 300 wives and 500 porcupines.

My teacher says Solomon was wise, but that doesn’t sound very wise to me.

After Solomon there were a bunch of major league prophets. One of these was Jonah, who was swallowed by a big whale and then barfed up on the shore.

There were also some minor league prophets, but I guess we don’t have to worry about them.

After the Old Testament came the New Testament. Jesus is the star of the New Testament. He was born in Bethlehem in a barn.

I wish I had been born in a barn, too, because my mom is always saying to me, ‘Close the door! Were you born in a barn’ It would be nice to say, ‘As a matter of fact, I was.’

During His life, Jesus had many arguments with sinners like the Pharisees and the Republicans.

Jesus also had twelve opossums. The worst one was Judas Asparagus. Judas was so evil that they named a terrible vegetable after him.

Jesus was a great man. He healed many leopards and even preached to some Germans on the Mount.

But the Republicans and all those guys put Jesus on trial before Pontius the Pilot. Pilot didn’t stick up for Jesus. He just washed his hands instead.

Anyways, Jesus died for our sins, then came back to life again. He went up to Heaven but will be back at the end of the Aluminum. His return is foretold in the book of Revolution.

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Aren’t kids amazing!? I’m sure that God is delighted with the misinformation that is generated in childrens’ minds. At the same time, I wonder what He thinks about the absence of knowledge and/or the blatant misinformation that is stored in the minds of His adult children. How can we say we love God, yet know little of the contents of His love letters to us, AKA: the Bible.

Think about it . . . .

A friend called the other day and said she was coming into town to go to the LSU/Auburn game and wanted to know which of us (my wife or me) was going with her because she had one extra ticket. I got to go. (Thanks, sweetheart!) As most in the Baton Rouge/Louisiana/country know, LSU won. They dominated Auburn . . . for the last second of the game. I had a lot of time to cogitate about that game, and the whole college football phenomenon while sitting in the car for an hour-and-a-half while trying to get off campus to go home. The seats we had were terrific. The game was a real nail biter. The final score was awesome (if you are an LSU fan). That Saturday night at Tiger Stadium was unbelievable, the air was so charged with excitement. I used to watch movies wherein characters talked about, “THE Game,” and I always thought it sounded so contrived. Now I realize that I’m asking people if they saw THE Game, or if they’re going to THE Game. I’m afraid I’m sounding artificial. Yuck!!

I recently read a quote by Bear Bryant following a question put to him regarding the hoopla about football when a college should place the emphasis on academics. His response made a lot of sense: “It’s hard to rally ’round a math class.” I think he was right on the money. And then I began to think of other events and people that we rally around. All sports have a following, even Curling. (You know, that game played on ice that involves sweeping with a broom to get the big tea kettle to slide a certain distance and direction. It’s kind of like shuffle board on ice.) Some movies have huge followings, including awful ones that gain a cult following, like, Napoleon Dynamite. Certain cars, or genres of cars, have a following. For some reason beyond my comprehension, body art attracts a lot of attention, and even has TV programs about it. (Isn’t body art an oxymoron in itself??)

Then the question that came to my mind was, “Why don’t Christians rally around Jesus?” I guess some do. The hyper-religious fanatics do. But that only turns off everyone else — Christians and non-Christians. (Fanatics were defined once as “anyone who is more religious than you are.”) Why can’t run-of-the-mill, upstanding, everyday Christians rally ’round Jesus with the zeal of sports fans, but without offending others? But wait, following that train of thought points out that anyone not cheering with you is turned off by your excitement and commitment to your team, or The person. Much like the Auburn fans probably felt about the LSU fans after a lucky pass completion with one second left in THE Game. So maybe what I (we) need to keep in mind is that there will be those who cannot identify with our excitement when we do get enthused about our life in Christ. And at the same time, there is no need to hide that excitement. It’s just prudent to exhibit it in a way that is considerate of others. Just like good football fans who are good winners, and don’t push the issue with fans of the opposing team. Isn’t that the way it is!? We allow those who choose differently to do so without judging or condemning, because that is not our responsibility . . . right?

Well, it is still a thought I’m working on . . . being excited about Someone who the world doesn’t understand, or just plain doesn’t like. Being excited without the fear of being a . . . fanatic. Being zealous without being obnoxious. Being genuine without concern for being judged. Being who you are created to be and celebrating it.

A few weeks ago our interim pastor delivered a sermon on The Gift of Blessing, and what a wonderful sermon it was! When he told me about his intention the week before he delivered the message, I was reminded of Myron Madden’s book, The Power to Bless. It tells of the importance of blessing one’s descendants and the impact it has. I have to say that being gracious with words to those individuals who have been so meaningful to me has not been one of my strong points. My adult children were visiting recently from their homes in other states, and I had a terrible time trying to find the words to let them know what a joy they have been to me throughout their lives. The pride I experience when I think of them is beyond compare. They are probably tired of being introduced to all of my friends, but I do it not to show off my friends (although I do want to let my kids know that I do have friends), I do it because I’m so proud of my children. I want everyone to know them and what wonderful people they are. I just have a tough time saying it out loud. I made an attempt to let them know these things, and it was an awkward attempt at best. Knowing the importance of blessing, I want them to have the assurance that they have my blessing. Continue Reading »